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Monday, September 20, 2004

Victory of the Blogosphere Bonus Top Ten:Top Ten Dan Rather "Folksy Texas Sayings" About What Went Wrong

Via Ace of Spades.

September 20, 2004

Victory of the Blogosphere Bonus Top Ten:Top Ten Dan Rather "Folksy Texas Sayings" About What Went Wrong

10. We were all hornswaggled worse than a blind dog sniffing at the ass of a decoy duck

9. Our fact-checking was looser than a three-toothed Galveston whore during Fleet Week when the rent's due

8. We got played worse than the only fiddle at an Houston hootenanny

7. We're dumber than a sack of hammers -- retard-hammers, that is

6. The story was rushed more than a Arkansas groom with bun in the oven and a shotgun to his crotch

5. Bill Burkett duped us harder than a carny-barker shilling for a game of "Stump the Chicken"

4. We got deeper into this mess than Hell's own septic-tank cleaner

3. We bent over for Ben Barnes harder than a new-fish at the Gainsboro Maximum Security Penitentiary Cotillion & Debutante Ball

2. I'm more in the tank for John Kerry than a Chicsaw County grifter with an eight-foot siphon

...and the Number One Dan Rather "Folksy Texas Saying" for What Went Wrong...

1. What do you want me to say? We all lean harder to the left than Michael Moore during a starboard-blowing squall, while simultaneously trying to balance in order to consume his own right foot

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